just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
accomplished twins. life is a go
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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