I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
