dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
I see more hoeing in ur future
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