we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Randomize
