My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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