piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
