I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
no you cant smoke seaweed
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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