I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
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