One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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