That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Randomize