Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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