there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize