Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
