everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
