Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Its about making memories worth repressing
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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