I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
