The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
