I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
