I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
