He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
