And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
