I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize