found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
