you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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