We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
