Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
