Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
