420 ftw
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Randomize
