Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
