dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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