I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
