Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
