After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Mom said you looked used
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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