Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
