You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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