we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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