Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Randomize
