watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
