You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
