oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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