im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
