If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
