They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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