No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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