So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
