guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
