I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Girls should come with a carfax report
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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