just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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