He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
