somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
