A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Randomize