Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
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