My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
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